There is a busy and congested highway in front of my house. I use this road sometimes driving my car and sometimes walking on foot. Every time I’m driving my car and I’m in a hurry (which is mostly the case), I think, “Why are so many people walking on this road? They come in front of my car all of a sudden, I manhandle it with the best of my learned vocabulary This abuse is mostly silent in my mind, which only I can hear, but sometimes, it comes out loud and clear.
But every time I walk the same path, my flow of thoughts flows in the opposite direction. “Why do these people who drive vehicles have no patience at all? What’s the rush? Is the world going to end?” when a vehicle touches me or another pedestrian, the abuses in the mind begin to unleash.
Lifer is like that too. Our opinions change based on our role/affiliation, which can change at any time. Sometimes we are with the government and sometimes with the opposition. Sometimes we are clients and sometimes we sell our ideas/products. Sometimes we are employees and sometimes bosses. Sometimes we are parents and other times we become children. Whatever role we play, we tend to prove the opposing party wrong with our logic, so that our position appears “correct.” But is it mandatory?
A bias towards the role we are playing at a particular moment is natural. But getting attached to it and becoming too biased becomes a hindrance in the flow of life. The ‘positional bias towards one’s position/role in society’ is a sin that is committed unknowingly most of the time.
You may ask, “why should I care about that at all?” Whenever you are the decision maker and your decisions affect others, this aspect becomes important and you should pay attention to it. If you are the CEO or in senior management, you have the luxury of requesting a presentation from your staff and thus getting all input before making a balanced decision/policy making. But ordinary people do not have this luxury and often fall prey to this syndrome of self-prejudice. The time to make too many decisions in daily life and the availability of all the inputs is limited for an ordinary person like you and me (someone like me who has written this article and someone like you who is reading it).
Having an unbiased view on critical/important ‘decision making’ is the key to a happy life, not just now, but also in the future. This skill set is not very difficult to develop and there are many meditation techniques available for this.
To get rid of this limitation, such a practice is suggested here. Just get an uninterrupted time/place, come to a relaxed position and become a witness to your thought process. Let these come, go and pass. Do not categorize into good or bad. The agitated movement of thoughts will stabilize and eventually lead to a ‘vacuum situation’ if we do this ritual. This can be done daily for a few minutes initially. Repeated practice will help develop a balanced attitude. When we witness ourselves acting out the drama of life with an impartial attitude, we don’t have to prove others wrong to prove ourselves right. Decisions made with this attitude are a perfect mix of logic and feelings and also according to our taste and comfort level.